Melissa McGuire

Hope everything was okay for you today.  That’ll be .75 cents plus tax.

Tax day in the City and County of Denver. I know this for a fact: Denver charges 3.5 percent on the dollar, “regular” sales tax.  4.0 percent is charged on food and beverage, i.e., restaurants and at liquor stores in sales tax.  You’ll get charged 7.25 percent for every dollar you spend with the Short Term Car Rental tax and a whopping 9.75 percent on a room in a hotel with the Lodger’s Tax.    That’s one way to encourage tourism – gouge them with special taxes. 

Additionally, everyone passing through Denver to make a purchase also pays, in percentage, 2.9 to the state, .6 to RTD, .1 for Science Cultural Facilities District (Yeah!), and .1 to the Football Stadium District

This information comes from a form called the “Denver Combined Tax Rates” provided to me by the City and County of Denver itself!

Can you say Income Tax?  I’m not going to go there at all.  I’m sure you won’t mind.

I have read in several sources over the years that we pay taxes until about Cinco de Mayo before we have money of our own.  And so what, right?  Money is called a liquid asset because it needs to be flowing.  I suppose my concern is over where the money goes. 

Everyone needs a job, and government jobs, well, it’s really hard to get fired from a government job.  I have, however, known people who have managed to get themselves fired, but that’s another story for another day.

Secure jobs are hard to find and that is what the government offers its employees: security.  My taxes pay for that.  That’s okay.  What’s not okay is people being paid by my tax dollars with fewer customer service skills than most fast-food restaurant employees have.  You and I both know that 98 percent of the people (ballpark figure) at Big Bob’s Burger Barn are working there only to get the skills to someday work elsewhere.

For a long time, actually since I was 23, I decided that everyone should be required to work for a time at one of the following three types of establishments for their own betterment: a low to middle-priced retail store during Christmas, a full service restaurant as a waiter, or a convenience store. 

The experience can be eye-opening.  Really, all the CEO’s and Presidents, all the trust-fund babies and spoiled rich kids, hell, even the “poor-me-why-doesn’t-anybody-GIVE-me-what-I-want” types could have a valuable experience by walking a mile in the other man’s moccasins. 

Thing is, I don’t know anyone who actually wants to experience the suffering of another, and yet everyone I know wants the rest of his phenomenological world to suffer with him.  Paradoxical indeed, n’est pas?

Back to the G-men.  Let’s require that the people we pay with our taxes be customer-service oriented.  My definition in this case would be to change their mantra from “I’m sorry I can’t help you. NEXT!” to “I’m sorry I can’t help you, but let me find out who can.”

I give my solemn oath that if I ever hear that phrase come out of the mouth of an employee of the City and County of Denver, I will wait patiently,  possibly with a smile on my face, for the sheer gratitude of being treated like a person.  That would be an effective use of my tax dollars.

That and the SCFD thing – gotta have art!
Headlines

Phillip King

You don’t ever have to agree with what a person says, but you should always LISTEN to what they have to say.

The TRUTH is that all you conscientious, war protesting objectors who wanted the U.S. to sit idly by while the United Nations sat around another twelve years to try and rid Hussein of his weapons, were wrong!

You were also wrong to question the U.S. going to war with Iraq to free its people!

The proof you are all wrong was in the reaction of the Iraqi citizens when they found out their leader was no longer in control. In that part of the world, when you slap someone on the face with the bottom of your shoe, it’s like spitting in someone’s face. In that part of the world, the lowest derogatory remark you can make toward a person is showing them the bottom of your shoes.  

This symbolizes that they hated this man and are no longer afraid to show their hatred toward Hussein. You know why they are no longer afraid? It’s because the United States military has proven that they are there to free Iraqis from Hussein and his regime, period!

Another thing: an Iraqi woman gave away the location to where an American woman soldier was held hostage, and Iraqis gave away the location to seven American POWs. Hmmm, seems odd to me that you war protesters would argue against a war that has obviously proven to be the right choice. This is why your arguments are wrong, why this war is necessary, and why it’s not about oil!

The mere argument that the only reason we have done this is to take control of their oil is crap! Nevertheless, let us, just for fun, say this is the only reason we have done this. Why not build up their government and buy oil from them? This is a perfect solution to the economic troubles of the Iraqi citizens and to the dying children under the age of five, who have died due to Hussein’s mistreatment of the oil-for-food program.

The reason the oil-for-food program has not worked is Hussein takes the money he makes and spends it on lush palaces, weapons, and his personal aids. It takes 60 million dollars to build one of Hussein’s palaces and he has 24 of them. Then you have to add all the little “necessities” he likes from a 20,000 bed, to solid-gold toilets. This information comes from web page www.eveningtimes.co.uk/hi/5014634.html   

If the United States helps Iraq build a democratic government and backs it like it does Japan, Iraq will have the control it needs to regulate the selling of its oil and will make enough money from other counties to help its citizens.

So sit there, call me a hate-monger, a baby killer for serving in the Armed Forces, and tell me that I’m an asshole for saying what I have just said. The truth is, you war protesters are wrong for not supporting the President, our military, and the people of Iraq!
Headlines

Jose Rocha

Relax, don’t worry, I won’t even attempt to take a stand on the war.  The Auraria Campus student body is anything but apathetic, and trying to justify war with Iraq is tantamount to beating a dead horse.  Any op. ed. writer should know better when surrounded by vandalized campus walls that say, “Drop bush not bombs” or plywood banners that say “We Ain’t stoppin, till bombs quit droppin”.

Therefore, instead of spreading my “poisonous conservatism”, or “right-wing idealism” or just plain barbaric thinking (sarcasm?), I will offer you a little bit of hard truth.  (If you’re looking for on opinion column to argue with, you’ve picked the wrong one.)  The truth, which needs to be brought to everyone’s attention, is this: you are an American, whether you like it, or not. 

In a nutshell, whether you are a war-hungry “dog of war” or you are an anti-war extremist.  Liberal or conservative, Republican or Democrat, legally benefiting or illegally benefiting.  Whatever color (even rainbow striped), religion; man, woman or child.  Whether you are a Dixie Chick, an uneducated celebrity, or even a member of the newly established Auraria campground.  Whether you hate your president, government or country, or whether you support it, or just don’t care.  That is the American Dream, and whether you like it or not, you are fuel to the American spirit. 

In any shape, size, religion or color, we all share a miraculous gift called the 1st Amendment, and even more, one called choice.  And whether or not you choose to recognize it, many people in this world hate you, because of it.  You have the ability to get away with a whole lot more then the rest of the world does, and that, is just not fair!  Many Islamic radicalists say you are all infidels; to the Iraqi regime you are Imperialists—Canada boo’s your national anthem, and France—well, we all know about France. 

Soldier or civilian, for or against the war; we are all in this together.  And whether or not you choose to accept it , as Americans, we all share the same amount of negativity that comes with being one.  As much as you may hate being American or as much as you cannot stand it, guess what?  Because you are allowed to feel that way, makes you one.

If you think that our supposed “biased media” is brainwashing you, or that we are being influenced by war supporting views, which tries to corrupt our way of thinking, well, cry me a river, because nobody is making you do anything.  As an American, you have the right to read it, listen to it, or watch it.  It is up to you, to decide, think and say whatever you want to.  We are not becoming zombies.  If you want to start a revolution and overthrow this government, get over it, you are in the wrong country.

Do not fear your country; if you don’t like your president, then say so.  But, we do not segregate this country because of opposing views, we’ve been down that road far too many times!  If you don’t like something, then argue, curse, kick, scream and “cry me a river”.  Rip this newspaper up if you want to; that is your right.  Hell, if you want, boycott me for exercising my freedom of speech; we’re already doing it to others on campus.

Either you can choose to be oppressed by your president, government or even the whole dam country, or you can choose not to.  That is your choice, as an American.  Can you hear it?  That, my fellow Americans, is the ringing of freedom.

So take that to the bank; take it on your campus marches and shout it through your bullhorn.  Maybe I’m just a little aggressive when addressing this issue, but that is my right as an American.

Take it, or leave it, America, that is your right.

Not all minds think alike, and we never will.

So, isn’t it great to be an American?
Headlines

Jenni Grubbs

I recently lost it.

When my dad was fired last Monday, I had a mental breakdown. I couldn’t stop crying, feeling anger and worry, natural emotions in that type of situation. But it wasn’t just a normal, healthy kind of emotional outburst. Mine lasted for nearly two days and involved moments of extreme happiness and extreme doubt and fear. At one point, I cried for nearly three hours straight. I just couldn’t stop thinking. My mind was all over the place. My stream of consciousness was literally like this:

What’s going to happen to my health insurance? And Mom and Dad have been supporting me…how will I get by? Will I have to get a second job and work more hours…if so, then how will I keep up in school? How are my parents going to be able to support three kids going to college? Will Dad be able to find another job…his job was so specialized…what will he be able to do? The economy is so terrible. Will he be able to find anything in Sterling? Oh, God! What if they have to move…will I lose my childhood home? What about Mom’s job…what would she do if they moved? I have so many ties to Sterling, how would I deal with them moving? What if he finds a job out of state…what if he doesn’t find a job at all? I depend on them for so much. I’m so scared…

A hundred miles a minute, all of that kept cycling through my head. I couldn’t escape my out-of-control thought process. I was at the bottom, in an extreme depressive state.

Then, all of a sudden, it hit me what else had happened that day. I had been chosen as the Editor of Metrosphere, Metro’s literary magazine. A position that I had spent a lot of time putting together my resume, begging for and gathering letters of recommendation, hiking the great distance to Central Classroom for an official transcript and writing the perfect cover letter to describe why I was perfect for the job.

My interview was on Monday, five hours before I found out about Dad. I was chosen for the position directly after the interview and my immediate reaction was to jump up and down repeatedly, saying “Oh My God!” repeatedly, and, finally, “Thank you!” to Deb Hurley, who was the one to tell me the good news.

I spent the next five hours on top of the world, calling everyone I’ve ever known and proclaiming the good news. I envisioned over and over what I could do with the magazine and how I would be able to create this wonderful book that would reach the campus. I was overjoyed that I would be able to stay in the “Pubs” office and see what happens with The Metropolitan and offer my advice and help. I had won the title and beat the competition. I was special and the Board of Student Publications recognized my specialness.

It was when I called my Dad to tell him the great news that I found out what had happened to him at work. I told him about getting Editor, and he softly said “That’s great Pumpkin,” (which is what he calls me), but his voice said something was really wrong. So after all this had happened, I asked him point blank what had happened.

My mind immediately began to circle all the horrible things that could have happened, like Grandma Jackie or Grandpa Bill had died, or Mom’s cancer had come back, or my brother or one of my sisters getting had been hurt or killed, or Dad had had a relapse from his stomach surgery last winter.

One thing that didn’t go through my head was what actually happened.

He asked where I was and I told him outside of class. He didn’t want to tell me what had happened, but I insisted. I was one of the first people he told. I was immediately devastated, and instantly my mind began swirling with all of the thoughts listed above and more. I started crying and didn’t stop for several hours. My teacher sent me home from class and I (scarily enough) made my way up I-25 at rush hour to my Mom’s parent’s house where my sister Heidi lives. I didn’t want to tell her, but knew I had to and I needed her support and to be able to comfort her.

Heidi helped me so much. She was calm where I was a mess. It was her strength that pulled me out of my depressive funk.

And then I got excited again about being the new Metrosphere Editor. It was a vicious cycle of both positive and negative excitement.

Officially Dad hadn’t been fired. He was asked to resign and was offered three months of administrative leave, which helps, but basically, he was fired. If he hadn’t resigned, he really would have been fired, with no administrative leave or severance.

Monday was a hard day for me. I went from one extreme to the other; I overreacted to both bits of news and paid for it in knots in my back, chewed-to-the-nub nails, unfinished homework, unpreparedness for the newspaper’s production and a blankety-blank face breakout.

It’s a scary world we live in right now. I see and hear about people being laid off, downsized, terminated, rightsized, let go, demoted, turned back, asked to resign, take early retirement, etc. All those euphemisms for being FIRED. But I never thought it would happen to my family. I guess you never do.

Yet, in the same day, I was hired… Oh the irony.
Headlines

Andrew MacPhail

What was the best thing that Jonah Goldberg could have done for every conservative in the greater Denver area on Monday afternoon? The answer is almost too simple: he could have answered Chomsky.

But Goldberg wasn’t prepared. He didn’t know whether he was supposed to be speaking on the war in Iraq or on the liberal media bias. He didn’t focus on either topic exclusively, rather, he hopped back and forth between the two and jumped through a few other subjects along the way.

Conservatives and liberals alike gathered in the Turnhalle on Monday afternoon to hear what the Student Activities Board billed with the lead, “Hot on the heels of Noam Chomsky, Student Activities is pleased to present a vastly different viewpoint on current events...” Instead of the much-anticipated contrasting viewpoint, Goldberg brought a mixed bag of humor, social commentary, statistics, and observations — which, although not bad in and of themselves, failed to win any ground for the conservative contingent in the wake of Chomsky’s brilliant address.

Goldberg was aware that Chomsky had paid a visit to Denver not too long ago, evidenced by his off-handed remark to the effect of, “like Chomsky might argue — I understand he’s been here recently...” but this still put no sense of urgency or direction into Goldberg’s speech.

Although Goldberg unintentionally began to answer Chomsky in his analysis of major television networks’ styles of war reporting and through his repeated descriptions of atrocities allegedly wrought by Saddam Hussein and his accompanying regime, when Goldberg deliberately aimed a  response to Chomsky, all he could say was that supporting the war in Iraq was justified because Chomsky opposed it.

Later, Goldberg observed that if “we created [the monster] Saddam,” then we’re responsible for cleaning up our own mess. This argument rings true almost unilaterally, but its impact was eroded by Goldberg’s utter and complete failure to address whether or not the media say what the government tells them to say.

Although addressing the issue of whether or not the media is biased has distinct merit, the matter that had to be dealt with was Chomsky’s insinuation that the media here were brainwashing us just as much as Iraqi National Television brainswashed Iraqis into wild, chauvinistic support of Saddam.

Goldberg’s definition of “liberalism” clearly exposed how he skirted the issue of media brainwashing. “Liberals,” he said, “are people who say, ‘if I say something long enough and loud enough then other people will think about it and take action on it and maybe we can change the world.”

Such a definition seems acceptable, especially given his perspective, until one sees the Merriam-Webster Collegiate Dictionary’s third definition of liberalism: “a political philosophy based on belief in progress, the essential goodness of the human race, and the autonomy of the individual and standing for the protection of political and civil liberties.”

Suddenly, Goldberg’s definition seems oddly accusing. It sounds like it involves brainwashing, but to say that either liberals or conservatives are brainwashing people is only true if the people who listen to their rhetoric accept it without question.

Who would do that? Sadly enough, we might. If we don’t do our own research and come to our own conclusions as well as listen to noted thinkers and critics, we will become what both Chomsky and Goldberg preach against: undereducated, presumptuous political reactionaries with nothing better to do than follow the best orator.
Headlines

Afghanistan conflict still needs time
Elisabeth Seaton
Guest Columnist

Thursday, April tenth, at the Tivoli, Emamudin Ghiasi, President of Afghan Refugee Association, and Dr. Sayed K. Hashemeyan, Chairman of Linguistics Dept. at Kabul University, 1979, met to discuss the future of Afghanistan. 

If you don’t know the history, a good link to get up to speed would be:  http://www.afghan-info.com/Politics/Hamid_Karzai.htm 

Basically, the US, and Afghanistan, have trusted some kooks, (Taliban, Osama bin Laden, and jihad army he amassed) and given them power and money and now we’re trying to right the wrong. 

As you can imagine, it’s not an easy job with fundamentalist armies we gave power to, murdering, suicide bombing, and ravaging the country. 

Hashemeyan suggested the US consult the Afghans for a leader.  He felt the current choice, Hamid Karzai, was not appointed “By the people, for the people.” 

You can read about it at: http://www.afghan-info.com/Politics/Interim_AfghanGovt.htm  He stated that the country is being run by “Warlordism” and will continue under the current “interim government.” 

For me, reading the facts, that Karzai is a “Warrior turned Peacemaker” is a little shaky.  At the same time, it’s hard to know whom to trust with current history.

Hashemeyan endorsed Professors and Bureaucratic men who were in place before the original coup in 1979.  He named people who should have been invited to the talks in Bonn. 

He criticized the role of the United States in Afghanistan as not fulfilling their promises of establishing law and order, uniting the country, or capturing Osama bin Ladin.

The majority of students in the audience, some Afghans, commented it’s too early to tell.  “Give it time,” an MSCD student suggested. 

I see both sides.  However, time has Afghanistan steeping in its own blood.  Seldom has Afghanistan had peace.  As Mr. Ghiasi presented in his presentation of the Afghan history, since October 2000, 67,000 people have been killed.  That’s twenty-two times September 11.

We can only hope that the United States keeps actively involved with the role and rulers of the transitional government. 

We can only hope Iraq will not be the next in line for such a history of tragedies.
Headlines

Letters to the Editor
Peace campers speak out

Dear Editor,

“Democracy fails without education” read the sidewalks.

Between 12 and 20 of us sleep here each night, and by day, as many as 50 conversations will be held with complete strangers.

Discussions of war, diplomacy, Iraq, Israel, power, money, ethics, government, religion,...

Nothing defines our camp more than this—that we are talking to people, and they are talking back.  No two of us agree with each other.

We are only here to ensure that this war, our government, and the world get discussed and researched frequently and fervently.

This is democracy.

This is what  a people governing themselves looks like.

The Peace Camp
Headlines

Letters to the Editor
Peace campers only disturb the campus

Dear Editor,

Can we as students do anything to get rid of the peace camp assembled in the center of campus?  They are a huge disturbance to students education.

The only thing they are doing is causing problems and starting trouble.  I saw the idiots burning an American flag today and it made me sick to my stomach to think that this could be going on, right here on our own campus.

I was so pissed that I could not even focus in class.

Please help by doing something to get rid of this filthy, disease that has inflected our campus and disrupted our education.

I have friends and fellow students who are fighting for this country right now as I am typing this email.

Adam Pomranka
Student
Headlines

Letters to the Editor
Liberals easy prey to anything/everything

Dear Editor,

What was Joel Tagert thinking when he wrote his article “Find the will to camp for Peace?”  He illustrates just how willing democrats are to accept anything pleasing that they hear.

It seems obvious to me that nonviolence doesn’t always work. 

It hit me like a slap in the face, that nonviolence has never worked in the way Joel Tagert suggests.

Nonviolent activists always quote Gandhi and Martin Luther King, Jr.  What ever happened to all the other nonviolent activists?  They failed.  Why?   You ask?  Because unlike Gandhi and Dr. King, they didn’t have the law on their sides. 

Ganshi had British law on his side in South Africa and India.  Dr. King had a little thing we call the Constitution on his side.

Is Mr. Tagert neglecting these important facts or did his emotions carry him right passed them?

Joseph Carroll
Student
Headlines

The Gadfly
Brian P. Reed
The Metropolitan

Consider the herds that are feeding yonder:  they know not the meaning of yesterday or today; they graze and ruminate, move or rest, from morning to night, from day to day, taken up with their loves and hates and the mercy of the moment, feeling neither melancholy nor satiety.

—Nietzsche, The Use and Abuse of History

Has my activity been quickened?  I am easily bored and, often, misunderstood.  I like that.

Alice was beginning to get very tired sitting by her sister on the bank . . .

and there is a small town in Paonia, Colo., that was in despair.  This little town has a problem.  The town is old. 

Filled with either ranchers who “earned” their property or environmentalists who have “turned on, tuned in & dropped out, ” there is great chagrin.  The question:  To spray or not to spray. 

Around Paonia, pesticides have semi-regularly been used to kill mosquitoes.  Usually, the mosquitoes are pesky little bastards that suck blood and go and use that blood to reproduce.

Unfortunately, the new mosquitoes have a new agenda—apart from sucking blood to reproduce (curiously, my black widow ex had this covered years ago)—they can kill herds of cattle.  But, beef has a price in Paonia.

Easily observable from afar, the dialectic continues.  Like a nad (yes, I said “nad”) salad dressing, these two sides battle over pesticides like a sycophant cheers for an existentialist.

In a nutshell, the mosquito company got bombed and all hell hath no fury like a women scorned.

I wish I was my dog.

You see.  And I pray you know where I’m going to go . . .

The pro-beefers are pissed at the anti-pesticiders.  While all do not like mosquitoes, many do not see them as a threat.  So, half pro-beefers are anti-mosquitoes and anti-pesticides and the other half are anti-mosquitoes and pro-pesticides.  The other anti-pesticiders are split, about in half, as well.  That is, while many anti-pesticiders are pro-beef, they are still anti-pesticide.This is in conjunction with the true fact that many are anti-beefers and pro-pesticiders (we call these “vegetarians”).  Now, some are still pro-beefers and remain anti-pesticiders, but we’ll call them anti-darwinists (and, for the sake of this column, let’s leave it at that).  Trust me,  ad absurdum.

Curiouser and curiouser! cried Alice . . .

Be still my beating heart.  The neighboring community of Delta may be wary.  You see, they want beef. 

They are not concerned about pesticides and mosquitoes.  They do not give a shit that the pesticides sprayed in Paonia kill mosquitoes, help the cattle ranchers, kill citizens downwind, jeopardize global-warming, affect the greenhouse and probably help sustain a virus at least as bad as SARS, because they  want beef.  More so, they need beef!

And, the caterpillar said:

Soon, we will hold close and embrace their greatest enemies if only to destroy them.  Breathe down the bastard’s neck and give education, knowledge, liberty, vision, and a world we will never see because we are history’s slave, trusting in our hearts, we were just.

So, enough, about the looking glass.  Trusting the end from the beginning:

‘Twas brillig, and the slithy toves

Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;

All mimsy were the borogoves,

And the mome raths outgrabe.’

Having sought refuge from the storm, the traveler found solace in a small barn, sans child or cheating girlfriend.    Cool.
Headlines

The Metropolitan welcomes letters of 500 words or fewer on topics of general interest.

Letters must include a full name, school affiliation and a phone number or e-mail address.

Letters might be edited for length, grammar and accuracy.