EYESIGHT
By Jenn
LeBlanc
jkerriga@mscd.edu
Gabrielle
Gelema LeBlanc is named after my grandmother, Georgia
Gelema. I wanted to name her Georgia Grace, but her
daddy didn’t like it. She goes by Gabe (NEVER
GABBY, and her full name is pronounced with a long “A” sound)
so, of these three names, I wonder of the other two:
would she have grown up any differently had they
been used?
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My
name, my badge of honor
So
what is in a name? If we consider the person to be in and
of themselves and not of their appearance, or what we call
them, then is a name important? Or is a name the first
and most important gift given to a child? There are names
that command dignity, and those that demand pity. The name
you are forced to spend your early years withódoes it define
you? The name on my birth certificate is Jenny Lee Barnum
(yes, like the circus. Yes, Iím related. No, we donít get
money. P.T. sold it years ago). And so it went, and I could
not wait to get rid of it. Particularly since Bailey tends
to be alphabetically placed close to Barnum and all the
Baileys I met as a child were boys and we never heard the
end of it.
But
that is not all. My gym teacher, Mrs. Sousa, always called
me Jennifer. It is NOT my name. For three years, I corrected
her and she ignored me. Finally, in third grade, she caught
me on a bad day and after correcting her, and her rolling
her eyes at me, I screamed "My name is NOT JENNIFER!
My name is Jenny!" and then I threw my backpack at her.
Of course she was across the room and it made it a mere three
feet, but nonetheless, I was sent to the school counselor
so they could determine what my mental defect was. I thought,
well, sheíll understand. So I explained it, as I have here.
It makes perfect sense to me, but the counselor (I do not
remember her name; she apparently was inconsequential) was
befuddled. "You donít want to be called Jennifer?"
"It
is not my name." I replied.
"Well,
what do you want to be called?"
"I
want to be called by my nameóthe name on my birth certificate,
the name that is on the class list." I replied, dumbfounded.
She looked at me, somehow still confused, and I said "Well,
perhaps I should call you ëGeorgeí and see how you like it?!" She
did not, and I was suspended for three days.
My
father punished me and then framed the letter from the principal.
I never understood the confusion.
Nicknames
are one thingóbut extensions? If it is not my name, then
it is not. I believe this to be simple. After my first marriage
my name changed (yea!) to Jenny Lee Kerrigan, which I liked.
I always had an affinity for all things Irish, so I liked
my new last name. My divorce came and went, but my last name
stayed. I kept it, much to the dismay of my ex. I wanted
the same last name as my two daughters, and I did not want
to go back to the circus. My second marriageóand consequent
name alterationóproved more interesting because I still wanted
the connection to my daughters. So, I kept Kerrigan as my
middle name, but I did not want to get rid of my former middle
name because I was named after a gun-slinging ancestor named
Jennie Lee (my dad didnít have the photograph at the hospital
and spelled it wrong by accident), who helped tame the "Wild
West." And I found inspiration in this. So, my name,
as it is now, is a sort of road map of my life. Jennylee
Kerrigan LeBlanc. A little southern, a little Irish and a
little French, which I speak not-so-well anymore. Mouthful.
So
here I am . . . Jenn LeBlanc, photographer. And I ask . .
. whatís in a name? My self, by any other name would still
be me would it not? Or would it? So I personally donít prescribe
to the "I donít care what you call me, just call me." I
guess I am more along the lines of, this is my name, it is
my badge of honor, it is my first impression, who I am and
who I have been. My name is connected to my self, and to
my soul and it helped to shape and form my life as I returned
the favor to it. The trials and tribulations of my name have
certainly helped to form opinions, which are held close to
my heart. It is my name . . . donít screw it up.
"Whatís in a name? That which we call a rose by any other word would smell
as sweet."
William Shakespeare Romeo and Juliet (II, ii, 1-2) |
