Insight

Coming out easier said than done

When my aunt returned from her family vacation to Washington a few years ago, she couldn't wait to tell us all about it. Ever the patriots, her family was thrilled with the monuments, the history ... the war.

However, her vacation came to a standstill when the Gay-Pride Parade marched in front of her hotel. She and her husband came to a decision that they wouldn't go out that day because they didn't want to subject their children, then 17- and 13-years-old, to the devil.

My aunt was appalled. High above from her hotel, she looked down at the GLBT community celebrating their diversity and pride.

"I had never felt Satan so close," she said.

She was wrong. I was sitting right next to her. In all seriousness, I'm not Satan. Maybe I'm a little bit of a devil, but the King of Darkness I'm not. Quite the contrary, I'm a Queen. For that matter, no member of the GLBT community is the devil or even a distant relative.

Friends, October is GLBT Awareness Month here at Auraria. More specifically, Oct. 11 is National Coming Out Day, a day-perhaps more important than Pride-for young and old queers alike to stand up and let themselves be known as a member of society that is different from the rest.

In this homogenous world we live in, diversity is becoming more and more important. Living in a completely hetero-world would be just as bad as if we lived in a world consisting of only Wal-Marts and Starbucks.

Coming out isn't easy. I'm not going to lie. I'm not completely out. The only people who know are my parents, brother and friends. Oh yeah, and the thousands of you reading this and my other work.

Alas, my grandparents and extended family (i.e. the aforementioned aunt) have not been passed the memo.

It's not that they'd have a problem. In my very-extended family we have a few cousins who are gay.

Monday night, I tried to say the words, "I'm gay," but the knots in my stomach muted me.

It has come to a point that coming out these days is just as bad as admitting to being a card-carrying prostitute. The media, even the GLBT media, continue to paint us boys as sex addicts, bitches and irresponsible members of society with the sole purpose of sodomy and circuit parties.

And when you're the darling grandchild, how can you fess up to that?

But as a friend recently pointed out, those facts about the community are only part of the picture.

I always tell my friends, when they ask me what is the "best" news source, that there isn't one-save The Metropolitan, of course. I think in order to find the truth, you have to look at all sides and listen to as many different sources as possible. You'll find the truth somewhere in the middle.

The same is true here. We are people, too. We bleed red. OK, maybe some of us bleed pink. We love. We want. We hope. We feel.

"Every single time we talk about our lives as GLBT Americans, we are another step closer to equality," Human Rights Coalition President Joe Solmonese said in a recent news release. "Each word helps build bridges that change hearts and minds-and, eventually, our laws."

We as a community, both friends and allies, must take our truths to the public square. We have to show and tell the world that we are not disease-infested, child molesters or cocaine addicts.

Moreover, we-just like all minorities-must fight the stereotypes and paradigms that have been instilled in the general public.

When I came out to my friends, they all reassured me they didn't have a problem with it. As a matter of fact, I've had some pretty interesting discussions with them about sexuality, gender, nature vs. nurture, etc. And yes, for the most part, nothing changed.

However, I wonder. Would someone who is OK with homosexuality continue to use the word 'gay' to describe something that isn't cool? Or what about the boys who label others they dislike as fags?

My father always tells me to "Guard your thoughts because they become your words. Guard your words because they become your actions."

Does using these terms and phrases beget hate?

Yes. But, we can't blame them. It's our own fault we haven't corrected them. A poll conducted by the Human Rights Coalition found, "many people who consider themselves to be 'out' also refrain from speaking to others about GLBT issues."

Until now. 'Mos and Moettes, talk to your friends. Show them the way of justice!

Wouldn't it be fantastic if breeders didn't use the word 'gay' to describe something wrong? And what if being called a fag was a compliment?

This theory continues in correcting all stereotypes damning homosexuality.

Maybe, just maybe, if we do enough educating, coming out won't be so difficult.

Maybe, just maybe, one day being homosexual won't be seen as a sin in society.

And maybe, yes maybe, my aunt will someday see me as an angel instead of a demon.