Five Questions for Reece King

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Text from last night
http://www.textsfromlastnight.com

Last night I received, “Why did I make a hit list last night containing only McDonald’s?” Replied with, “You tried to order a margarita McFlurry and when they said they didn’t make those you tried to call 911.” (No. 521)

“I just had a conversation with my cat in the shower about pancakes. We both like them a lot.” (No. 3327)

“Dude I’m not sure who’s apartment I woke up in but I just showered here and their shampoo is phenomenal.” (No. 2734)

Last night from a hammered friend: “Just tried calling my phone on my phone because I thought I lost my phone.” (No. 754)

FML: Everyday stories
http://www.fmylife.com

Today I ran into my ex-boyfriend in town. We broke up a year ago because he “moved” to Florida. (No. 3910335)

Today, I received a letter in the mail stating that I won a trip to Cancun, Mexico. It looked like a scam so I threw
it away. I later found out that it was a birthday present from my cousin and the envelope also contained a check
for 5 thousand dollars to help cover some expenses. (No. 3877056)

Today, I learned when you’re babysitting a 5-year-old, when you hear the toilet flush and the words “Uh oh,” it’s already too late. (No. 3906915)